A couple of weeks ago, in our Bible Study, we discussed the topic of forgiveness. We talked about how we have been taught that we cannot be forgiven if we haven’t forgiven others.
Sometimes, we forgive yet the wounds are still there, even years later. We can forgive AND still feel pain associated with that person or situation. This is NORMAL. If you steal from me, I will forgive you for your sin against me. I will not, however, leave you alone in a room with my wallet. That’s called wisdom. My pastor has a saying, “Wisdom violated is chaos created.”
When we put on the religious burden of forgiveness with no room for emotion, we paint ourselves in a corner. Bottling up the pain someone has caused is unhealthy. It’s also lying if you want to be technical. We can forgive someone of unforgivable trespasses and later have the same painful emotions rise up. This doesn’t mean you haven’t forgiven them. It only means you are still healing from the wounds they caused you.
The thought of us being unforgiven because we have painful feelings is absurd. By putting our faith in the finished work of Christ, we are forgiven. Our emotions don’t negate the Cross of Christ.
If you have been wronged, don’t fall for the trap of the enemy that says, “You’ve been violated and because you feel emotions you really haven’t forgiven them. Now you’re not going to be forgiven by God.” Now you’re hurt and feel abandoned by God.
We have received once-for-all forgiveness. Forgiveness toward the offending party is for our benefit, to set us free. We have been forgiven much, so let’s be free with our forgiveness. Let’s also be honest about our pain so we can receive healing.
(See Jeremiah 8:11, Mark 8:23 – 25, Ephesians 4:32, and Hebrews 10:10.)