Author: danturnerjunior

A few years ago, Crystal and I set sail on a cruise ship out of New Orleans. It was February, so it was the perfect time to go somewhere tropical. We spent a day in New Orleans and went on a five day cruise. When we got off the ship, we were ready to go home.

The car we drove at the time did not have cruise control. I was going over the posted speed limit when I saw the red and blue lights in my mirror. I looked down at the speedometer and knew I was busted.

The Highway Patrolman asked me to step out of the car. We went through the ticket process. When he looked at my license and saw my address, he mentioned his son went to school at a local university. We talked about the southwest Missouri area a little bit. Then, something happened that has made me think deeply ever since.

Remember, we were on our trip in February. I was wearing a black hoodie. I was speaking with a black officer. While we spoke, I was getting cold and did a very natural thing. I put my hands in my pockets.

For those of you who don’t know me, I am six feet seven inches tall and at that time I weighed about 300 pounds. This officer was about five feet eight inches tall and weighed about 180 pounds. He was solo on his patrol and we were standing on a secluded roadside on the border of Louisiana and Arkansas.

This good and responsible officer saw me put my hands in my pockets and paused the conversation to say, “For my safety and yours, please take your hands out of your pockets.” I quickly obliged and apologized. We continued to talk a few minutes longer. He wrote the ticket, and we parted ways.

I think about this situation every time there is news of another unarmed black man who was killed while in police custody. Let me pause here to say, I have family and friends who are respectable, hard working, good, professional police officers who want nothing more than to serve and protect their communities. Please don’t think I am lumping all officers together. There are many more good officers than there are bad.

However, there are some officers who have no business carrying a badge and a gun. There are those who take life and liberty without due process. They have a narrative that they believe and cause fear among our fellow citizens.

Back to my encounter with this officer. I often think, what if our ethnicities were reversed? Would I be writing this post as a free man? Would I be here at all? Could my actions of putting my hands in the pockets of my oversized black hoodie as I towered over this officer be considered a threat and justified lethal force?

To my Brothers and Sisters who don’t look like me, know that I love you. There are many who look like me who want to be there for you to stand up to injustice and comfort the hurting. I will never know what it’s like to be black in America. However, my family and I will always stand with you.

To the officers and policymakers, I implore you to make the necessary changes in culture within your departments. If there is an individual or group within your department who demonstrates racism, do the hard thing and replace them. Push past the political pressure of the unions and take away their badges before they take life and liberty from citizens.

I pray for peace and understanding within our great country. I pray for rich relationships across cultural lines. I pray we can have the courage to have the difficult conversations with open and understanding hearts.

“Enough! You’ve corrupted justice long enough,
    you’ve let the wicked get away with murder.
You’re here to defend the defenseless,
    to make sure that underdogs get a fair break;
Your job is to stand up for the powerless,
    and prosecute all those who exploit them.” -Psalm 82:2-4 (MSG)

Before the Coronavirus pandemic, before shelter in place orders were given, and before going to work daily during uncertain times, I had the fight of my life with anxiety.

Crystal and I made the decision to buy our new home. We found beautiful, fully renovated home in a quiet area on two secluded acres with lots of trees. It’s our little slice of Heaven. We made an offer, negotiated, and made a deal. We were getting our dream home!

Just to put things in perspective, we purchased our former home when we first moved back to Missouri. I was starting over in the RV service industry and Crystal worked part time in retail. We lived in that home for seven years as we built our lives and climbed our respective career ladders. So, we skipped about two levels of home purchases when we found this one. We had to stretch our faith and checkbook to make it work.

When we were in the buying process, we had some things come up which caused challenges in the financing. We had to change lenders at the last minute and figure some things out. However, we found favor through it all and closed on our beautiful home. However, we still had our original home we needed to sell. If it didn’t sell in a few months, we would be in huge financial trouble.

Our original home had nice qualities, but had been covered by drab paints and finishes. I wanted to get it to it’s best before putting it on the market. So, I went to work. Nights and weekends, I worked for what I thought would be a couple of months. However, because I can’t just slap paint on it and call it good, the project lasted nearly six months.

For six months I worked 80 plus hour weeks, mostly alone with my thoughts. Now, I am an optimist by nature. However, I came to a point of despair about four months into the project. Pressure was building at work. I was never at home with my family. Finances were tight and getting tighter by the week. We had this beautiful home that I only saw after 10 PM and left around 7 AM. I felt pressure like I had never experienced in my life.

I would love to say I was “spiritual” and sang worship music and read my Bible more than ever. I would be lying if I said that. I did listen to every message from my favorite preachers and listened to multiple audio books and podcasts. If I hadn’t, I’m not sure what shape I would be in today (or, honestly, if I would be here at all). I grew weary fighting this battle for so long in seeming isolation under constant pressure.

I was tired, yet I continued to press on. Why? Because it had to be done and we couldn’t afford to pay someone else to do it. I have a gift, and sometimes curse, of seeing the trajectory of actions and processes. It has made me successful in my career. However, it caused severe anxiety during this time. If I didn’t get the home ready to sell in a timely manner, we were ruined financially. I could see what could happen and it was ugly.

I had to take one Saturday off, not to rest, but to work on my van that I had ran into a ditch. Again, I was tired. I was working on it while fielding calls from work where I had to explain failures by my team to my boss. When I got off the phone, I was DONE. I’m so thankful for what happened next.

I was giving in. I was finished with the fight. I was looking for the towel to throw. Then, Crystal walked into the garage and I broke. You see, she was in a battle of her own and I didn’t want to burden her with my worries. So, like an idiot, I tried to carry my burdens and help carry hers without communicating where I was. When she walked in at that moment, I knew my Father had sent her. We talked, we cried, and we came together in a profound way.

Nothing changed on the outside. We were still in trouble. I was still exhausted. There was still too much to be done in the time we had. However, I was strengthened. We brought our situation before the throne of God and gave it to Him. I realized on a soul level that I couldn’t carry this weight to the finish line. But, He could.

Crystal reached out to her parents who were more than happy to help us in the final stages of the remodel. Others came along to help. Our realtor loved what we had done with the home and put it on the market. I got a Facebook message for an old friend who had been following the progress and was in the market. Within FIVE DAYS, we were under contract. I met him and his wife to show the details of the home and he told me, “It’s like you made it for me. The colors are exactlywhat I would pick.” The home was finished and sold within a week of my self-imposed deadline.

Why did I share this story? Many reasons. It illustrates the Grace of God in the darkest times. He was at work in the background, orchestrating our blessing. He was moving on the hearts of others when I didn’t feel I could call on anyone (I didn’t want to be a bother). Perhaps the greatest lesson I learned in that season was a phrase I had almost passed off as cliche.

“Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7 NASB)

I grew up thinking that if I was spiritual enough, I wouldn’t worry. I honestly thought I needed to “grow in the Faith” or trust in God more when I felt anxious. I’m a guy many church leaders come to when they have questions and ideas that they want help with. How could I have struggled so much in that recent season?

I have learned a valuable lesson and I hope to help you in a difficult season. While this lesson is so simple, it can be missed; especially by “spirituality mature” believers.

Here is the lesson: You cannot honor Scripture by being self reliant to the point you convince yourself that you don’t need any help. The Scripture honoring way to work through a crisis of any kind is to cast our anxiety on Him. Understand that He has placed people in your life to help in your time of need.

Now, have I been perfect in this? The answer is a resounding no. I, like many of you, have been under pressure during this pandemic and economic downturn. I have had moments where I wanted to “lose it.” Thankfully, I have people in my life I can confide in and talk things through. I have written this as a lesson I am continuing to learn.

Are you spiritual enough to admit that you are experiencing anxiety? Are you mature enough to ask for help? What I have discovered is, people who God has placed in your life, are willing and able to be God’s tangible goodness in your life. They are standing ready even when they are facing challenges of their own. You are NOT a burden. Simply ask for help and place your anxiety on Him. Why? Because He cares for you.

Blessings.

We have traveled our nation’s highways on many road trips. Living in the middle of the US makes nearly any destination within the continental US within a two day driving distance. There is a point where we become closer to our destination than we are to our origin. At this point, we are committed. The journey to where we were is longer than the journey to where we are going. There is no turning back.

In life, we experience these points many times. When I proposed to Crystal, I could have psyched myself out of it up to the point I was on one knee with a ring box in my hands. After all, she didn’t expect me to propose. I could have given myself so many excuses as to why I should postpone this grand gesture. However, I reached the point of no return and overcame the fear to ask the most important question I have ever asked.

What is holding you back from your destination? Is it fear to reach the point of no return? Are you letting off the gas and looking for an exit to turn around as you approach this crucial point? Are excuses disguising themselves as reasons why you shouldn’t move forward?

I encourage you today to race past your fears. Look at the point of no return as a place to celebrate! This is where you overcome your biggest struggles. The point of no return is where you make the choice to reach your God-given destination. This is where you say, “I’m going for it!” There are still pit stops,traffic, pot holes, and construction zones along the way, however, you’re closer than you have ever been to your destination.

Put your foot on the skinny pedal on the right. Press it down and listen to the Navigator who is within every believer. You will be so glad you did.

Have you ever thought about something for a long time, trying to sort out a solution? When you finally have the answer, you tell someone what you’re thinking, they tilt their head to the side and simply stare at you. Maybe you haven’t experienced this, but I have more often than I care to admit.

We all have a tendency to get in our own heads. There are many times in my career where I have thought about an issue, devised a solution, created flow charts and walked up to a trusted colleague to tell of my grand plan. I open my mouth and immediately realize I have missed a key component to the solution and all my planning became practice. I have to start over. Worst yet, there was a simple solution which took about 30 seconds to discover after opening mouth and inviting someone else into the conversation.

We have all experienced this phenomenon. We get in our heads, overthink the situation, and miss the simple answer. At least, I hope I’m not alone in this.

As individuals and as groups, we can get in our heads. We can spin things around and around until we believe a certain way. That’s the only possible answer to this problem. That is, until we open our mouths to explain our answer to someone of a different mindset.

If we speak only into the echo chambers, we only hear our voice. However, there is a higher way. Let’s get away from group think. Let’s listen to opposing mindsets. Let’s do the difficult task of listening for the other person’s heart rather than listening for an opportunity to interject your side’s talking point.

“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.” (Ephesians 4:15 NLT)

I had a Dad moment yesterday afternoon. While moving some of the bulky items from our garage, I noticed the tires on the dolly were a little low. I was about to move my eight foot wooden work bench, so I needed to have everything in good working order. I realized when I unloaded the bench I blocked the way to my air compressor.

I then looked down and saw Dad’s little air tank. It’s an old freon tank that he painted black and converted into a portable air tank to air up tires when he was a mechanic. I remember this tank being used numerous times throughout my childhood to help someone out of a jam.

The air tank is scratched up and decades out of its certification date. Dad gave it to me about five or six years ago and it’s been on my bench ever since. However, I reached over and turned the valve. To my delight, I watched the little gauge rise from 0 PSI to 50 PSI. I aired the tires up,said, “thanks Dad,”and moved my work bench with ease.

Dad made things work in order to help people and make life a little easier. He helped me yesterday even though he has been gone for over four years now. I encourage you to leave a legacy of help and make someone’s life a little better today.

I live in Southwest Missouri. In the springtime, we experience some extreme weather. Namely, severe thunderstorms and tornadoes. These weather situations are no surprise to anyone who lives in this region because they occur every year around this time.

In life, storms will come. This, we cannot control.

Sometimes we can see them coming and take cover. Other times, storms come out of nowhere and we are too far from shelter to do anything but pray. (And prayer is enough.)

There is a peace that doesn’t make sense. As a Believer, you have this peace within you. You are never too far from Shelter, no matter how quickly the storm arises. The Shelter is within each and every Believer. It’s our choice to endure the brunt of the storms of life or to take Shelter.

His Shelter is strong. His Shelter will stand. His Shelter will protect. We may hear the wind around us. We may see the devastation around us. We may even have some scars. However, His Shelter will stand and we will have victory.

Jesus left His Peace with us. He let us know that we have a choice to take Shelter. He is the Prince of Peace and is more than happy to provide His Shelter, no matter the strength of the storm.

I encourage you to read the following scriptures and commit them to heart. You never know when you will need to seek Shelter.

John 14:27
Philippians 4:7

As we near the end of 2018, I have been working on the plan and forecast for 2019. I took a moment at the end of the day to read a chapter of a leadership book. I came across the following statement in the book “Tribes” by Seth Godin:

“We live in a world where we have the leverage to make things happen, the desire to do work we believe in, and a marketplace that is BEGGING us to be REMARKABLE.”

I have written about the Seven Mountains in the past. If you are a person climbing your mountain of influence, this quote should resonate within you. I believe we are called to be REMARKABLE.

Some are remarkable, but not in a good way. Some experiences with individuals and organizations elicit a negative remark. Others bring a smile to our face and give us a good story to tell. I encourage you to be part of the latter.

As Seth states, “the marketplace is begging us to be REMARKABLE.” I have found the difference between a great remark and a terrible review is usually just a single step or the completion of one.

“Good enough,” rarely is.

There’s nothing like having a real man in your life… especially as a young man. I had the privilege of being raised by a “Man’s Man.” The thing about a man’s man is they have little patience for wimpy or dishonorable males. That being said, Dad’s friends were themselves men among men.

What brings this to mind this cold Saturday morning, was the passing of President George HW Bush. During one of his funeral services, Bob Dole stood from his wheelchair and saluted his good friend and fellow combat veteran. Senator Dole required assistance from another man to honor his friend. He saluted with his combat injured arm. I’m sure his salute at attention was sharp and textbook as a twenty something while he was putting his life on the line for our country. However, there has not been a more perfect salute than what we witnessed this week.

The salute made me think about the men I have been blessed to have in my life. I learned the value of honor, respect, true strength, consistency, and though it was hard for many of them to say… love. Dad and his friends were the ones who taught me these values. They all loved their wives, their kids, and their community. It thrilled me to be around these MEN as I was learning who I was.

Dad and his friends were each unique. They all had different strengths and challenges. However, they each had these honorable qualities. When I was around these men as a boy, I learned there are different approaches to life. With that, the end goal was the same.

As a man, we love our wives.

As a man, we love, teach, and support our children.

As a man, we love our daughters and teach then to be strong and capable.

As a man, we love our sons and teach them to be strong and accountable.

As a man, we treat other women as sisters and provide a safe environment to flourish.

As a man, we mentor young men. We give extra support to the fatherless.

As a man, we make sure our parents are honored in their golden years.

As a man of Faith, honor God and his Word in all decisions. If someone is of another belief, show them the love of Christ.

As a man, we give 100% in our careers. There are no free rides worth riding.

As a man, we may have a hard time communicating. However, we are there for the people in our lives regardless of our struggles.

As a man, our word is our bond. Circumstances may prevent our completion of our commitments. However, we don’t fail from lack of effort.

I have been blessed to be raised by a Man and around Men. As a young man, I was blessed to find Mentors. As I move forward through my forties, I have the honor of raising a son, mentoring and leading others.

Dan Turner Sr., Lee Royer, Jim Whitlock, Jim Turner, Jerry Whitlock, Steve Jones, Kent Medlin, Brad Gadberry, Jack Thornton,Doug Wilkerson, Howard Nunnelly, Roy Whitlock, James O. Turner, Walt Whitlock, Greg Wilkerson, and many others worthy of mention were the MEN who demonstrated to this child and young man what it means to be a man. I honor each of them who have passed. I am thankful for those who are with us. Without you men, I would not have known who to allow to speak into my life through the years.

We were talking with our kids the other day about money and mindset. We are pretty open with our kids about life (age appropriate of course). We make plans and discuss our goals with them present so they can see how to work together in marriage.

When we were in less than ideal jobs, we learned lessons we could use later on. We read books, listened to messages, and spoke with people who were either where we wanted to be or going that direction.

We let our kids know how we struggled for some time financially. There were times when the paycheck was spent before it was in hand. I remember walking into the store with $20 to buy groceries, diapers and formula for the week. We have had to swallow our pride and ask for help at times.

We explained how the right mindset is vitally important.  I told them, “We have been BROKE, but we have never been POOR.” Broke is a financial situation. Poor, is a mindset about life. One can have no material possessions with the right mentality and come out on top.

We put our faith in Christ and put our hands to work. We learned patience with hope. When life didn’t look like it was going to be okay, we stood on our faith, believing and working like God’s Word is true. It isn’t easy, but it’s the truth. (See 1 Corinthians 15:10)

I have seen financial miracles in our life.  I’ve seen dollars stretch to cover more than they should have by my math.  We have been blessed by generous people when we were struggling.  I am thankful for those times.  I am also thankful for what we learned.

Here are a few lessons we learned along the way.  No one owes us anything simply because we exist.  Personal finances are our personal responsibility.  Our choices lead us in or out of prosperity.  Work is a good thing.  Sometimes we have to go outside of the box (8-5 job) to make it work.  Be generous at every stage.  Aim for the pinnacle, even if you’re in the valley.

Our kids are watching what we do.  Seek Wisdom.  Learn, learn, learn.  Communicate with each other.  Work together.  Perhaps, they won’t have to endure the same hardships we put ourselves through.

Why have I posted so much on social media about Keto? We have experienced the benefits of foregoing the Standard American Diet (SAD). I’ll let Crystal tell her story in her own way.

I was at a point where I should have gone to a doctor. However, I knew I would be prescribed a cocktail of medications. I watched my Dad endure the side effects of modern medicine. I just couldn’t bring myself to go through it when I knew there had to be a way to take charge of my own health.

I have never been a normal sized person.  I thought “Husky” was a brand name of jeans when I was a kid.  I didn’t realize it wasn’t normal to be a 10 year old shopping in the men’s section.  As a sophomore, I weighed 275 and my size 36 loose fitting jeans were so tight you could count the change in my pocket.

The last time I weighed was in November. I had been working out and eating “right” for some time. I was DOWN to 308. We had a trip to Vegas and… I haven’t been to the gym since. The holidays came and went. I packed on the pounds and basically gave up. I have no idea what I got up to, but I would say I gained at least 10 pounds.  Likely much more.

Fast forward to today.  I weighed in at 259.8!  I’ve also shed 10 inches of belly fat.  This is the first time in nearly two decades I’ve been in the 250’s!  I feel better than I have in years.  I’m also in size 36 regular fit jeans which are beginning to fit loosely.  I’m better physically and mentally than I imagined I would be again.

I wish I could say my faith was strong and I knew I would be miraculously healthy.  However, my faith was there to see wisdom when it was presented to me.  Thank you to Brad Gadberry for taking the time to share this with me.

My encouragement to you today is trust Wisdom when you are presented with it.  Sometimes True Wisdom is counterintuitive to popular wisdom.  When God whispers something in your spirit… listen.